8/13/2007

Yesterday the three of us, my husband, our son and I, went up to see the possible house. It is still very beautiful and I think could work very well for us. Our son loved the room that would be his, and especially loved the two mini-fridges in the house, hoping one could become his. My husband agreed the house was wonderful, but is concerned that the garage isn't big enough for our cars and all our garage stuff, now stored in our old barn. And after being so enthused about living up at a ski resort, my husband has begun to have reservations. The reservations are contagious...now I, too, am having doubts. There is so much I love about the house, but of course, there are some things that would be issues. Like piles and piles and piles of snow, maybe even into May. Like being in a whole different growing zone (already we're in Zone 4 in our valley). Like it is a very scarey and steep hill to get up and down in the winter...and what if there were an emergency? (Notice I remain unconcerned about the garage issue, though I probably would realize the inconvenience while scraping ice off my windshield for the umpteenth time. In October.)

So we went back and forth about it last night. Tempers were thin, tears were at the ready. And that was just me. I was taking the "Let's just do it," tack, safely knowing my husband was not yet ready. This morning when he said, "Let's go ahead and make an offer," a huge fear gripped me, and tears flowed again. I pictured us walking away from our home and village of many years, belongings bundled on our backs, "Annatevka" from Fiddler On The Roof playing in the background.

Will we buy this house? I really don't know yet. We are going to find out what our current property is actually worth to see if we could even really afford the new place - I'd been blithely assuming so but after looking some prices of places comparable to ours, I'm not so sure. And, the realtor told us there are some other people (out-of-staters) interested in the mountain house - they'd wanted to buy it before it was for sale and ended up buying another house on the mountain instead. Now they're putting the house they just bought 8 months ago on the market. If they buy "our" mountain house, will I be relieved or regretful?